Homeschool

In light of the current Covid situation we find ourselves in and the fact that we are about to enter the world of Homeschool again (!) I was thinking about when we did this the first time.

Several years ago I did not know how to do Home School and did not want to try it at all! I didn't know anyone who was doing it except for one family in our old neighborhood- but that mother was sort of a wonder woman type that taught ALL of her 8+ children at home and they were all geniuses who she had also taught violin and piano. That was not me.
However, the idea of it kept coming to me because my fourth grader was having a really hard time in school that year. Like all my children he was shy and sensitive, but this year he was worried and often had stomach aches and did not want to go to school.
Looking back I believe there may have been some bullying going on, but he didn't use those exact words and I didn't want to see that.  I did glean that his class was full of some rowdy boys-some pretty strong personality types that the teacher struggled to manage. It was her last year of teaching before she retired and while I felt for her, the class was a chaotic and scary ordeal for my son.
  I would have liked to volunteer to help in the class to see for myself what was going on but I had young children at home and no one to babysit for me.  I had heard some disconcerting reports from other parents who had, and it was confirmed difficult situation.  I won't go into all that was reported to me because I have since had many teaching experiences that opened my eyes to how difficult some classes and some students can be, so I'm not laying blame at the teachers feet alone.  I remember having a few conversations with the Principal about what we were going through and that she also acknowledged there were some problems there.

 By the time we got to the end of February, we were exhausted and it seemed there was nothing left to do but to take him out of school. I was shocked at how easy this was. I had to call someone and say I was doing it and I think they mailed me a form to sign.
It felt like jumping off a cliff but because we felt some quiet assurance through prayer,  and also we reasoned that because there were only a few more months of the school year before the summer we felt that we might as well.
One of my neighbors had heard of someone in the area who was also doing school at home and gave me her number.  This dear woman, with a son my son's same age, came right over to talk to me and brought me books and invited us to their Friday "field trip" group and we felt like maybe it would be okay.  We loved the books, especially "A Thomas Jefferson Education" where we learned that all great thinkers were self-taught. Also that people love and will learn naturally on their own unless that desire is beaten out of them, which can happen sometimes, as outlined in another book I read about how modern schools were originally set up not to enhance learning but to train people who do what they're told and work well in factories.  One book suggested that we shorten attention spans by dividing learning segments up into seven subjects a day-that the focus of hurry and get this done so we can go on to the next thing is not a natural thought process. Since then I have seen a lot of kids in the schools I have worked at just begin to enjoy and get into something when it's time to go on to something else.

 I became aware of and love the idea that we are each responsible for our own learning and education and that after a period of "recovery" a child will naturally be drawn to educating themselves, that we can just get out of the way and let them guide it, be there for them and help them gather the resources they need.
 In our home school we had a morning devotional where we read some scriptures and prayed. Then we read books that were to become very meaningful to us like "Little Britches" and "the Narrative of the Life of Frederick Douglas". We were inspired and moved by story of Frederick Douglas who taught himself to read and write despite being beaten for doing so.  Then we'd pick some other subject of interest and read about that online or go to the Library.  We did attempt math a few times but that is not my strong suit and I admit that we failed here. Once we set up plastic toy soldiers and enacted WWII-even though we did it inaccurately. We watched some movies that had some historical relevance and even some musicals because, well, I liked them. We also did some cooking and some other kitchen "science" experiments ( can you do too many baking soda and vinegar volcanos?) and on Fridays we'd go with the group to a museum, planetarium (free once a month to home school groups) or park or go to someone's house for an art project.  One family was so generous and made a number of pies for "Pi" day, we went to their house a number of times and they have since moved away.  I feel sorry I don't even remember their names. I will never forget their kindness and hospitality.
Another concept we read about is that sometimes a child is so traumatized by a harmful school environment that they forget their love of learning and need to recover. I was happy to learn you help this by playing. I am a big believer in playing and in giving children a lot of opportunities for free time and for free play.
I felt my children certainly got that and am pleased that we were on that course anyway. There were many years full unstructured time and of playing together including drawing, dolls, tea-parties, putting on plays and time to be bored.

Of course, my younger children enjoyed these home school experiences too.  The whole thing opened our eyes about the owning of ones education and allowed us to trust that people don't need to be force-fed to learn, but be supported and allowed to genuinely love learning. Once in another setting someone asked my daughter who was four "where she went to school" with a great deal of aplomb she replied "I do HOMESCHOOL." The experience also helped me realize that this same child who was not happy in her preschool situation didn't need to be forced to do that either. I was a little sad about it because her older sister loved  her experience there and I couldn't figure out why it was so different for this child. She was adamant and tearful about not going and we said "Ok" and let it go. Many years later she quipped "Remember when I had to go to preschool where they made me eat bananas and then my throat would close up and I couldn't breathe!"  Well, that was enlightening and I wondered why I had never noticed that she didn't eat bananas!-probably the result of being number 4 of 5 children, sorry to say. I also believe this greatly influenced her own well-being when she faced some difficulties later in High School.

The parents of the group had a book club and we read books including "Jane Eyre" then we'd get together for a discussion while the kids played. One time it was at the "Pi" house and they opened their swimming pool and the kids had a great time.
We held "home school" for the remainder of the year and I remember it fondly as one of the best experiences of our lives. We grew and changed our minds about holding teachers completely responsible for what we learn. We recovered somewhat from the bad behaviors we'd witnessed and grew in our appreciation for our own learning styles and admitted that the public school system does the best it can given the circumstances.

The next year my son was ready to go back to school for 5th grade and he had a great teacher and a great year!

I learned that sometimes as a parent you have to do some things you didn't expect, or that you didn't want to do, but you just do the best you can with what you have and that is fine. I learned that sometimes those things seem really difficult but that in the end you look back on those experiences with gratitude that you let them come to you.


P.S .Due to Covid, our youngest finished his High School Career doing all online work and Graduated in June. More on this later.